Just Do What Needs Doing

On Monday night, I received a phone call from (this gets a little tricky here *smile) the mother-in-law of my son by my husband's first marriage. It probably sounds confusing, I know, but Robert is mine as much as the four children here at home are. There was a family crisis and mother-in-law wanted to let me know that she had urged Robert (my step-son) to call me and my husband, Robert's dad. After I got off the phone with Robert's mother-in-law, I returned a call that Robert had placed while I was out. He kept saying "I don't know what I'm going to do. I don't know what I'm going to do." We talked about just doing what needs doing. We talked about making good choices, no matter the circumstances of our birth, our upbringing, our education etc. We talked about accepting responsibility for our own actions and dealing with whatever life hands you because you simply have no choice. You do what you have to do. I may not have ever been in the same situation that he's currently in, but heaven knows that we (my family and I) have had a lot of experience with learning how to handle crises and the difficult things that have come our way in addition to the every day things.

I had intended to post about this subject Tuesday morning, but we had a family emergency. My mom, while on the phone with 911, came to get me. (Thankfully, we live next door to each other.) My dad had a seizure and was unconscious. I ran next door with mom, told her to go in the house and get a blanket, and then sent my daughter (who had followed me over there) home to get her dad. My dad was transported via ambulance to Lakeview Memorial Hospital. David drove my mom down, and after going home to call my brothers and my uncle, and to leave my oldest daughter in charge of her siblings, I drove down in our car. Dad briefly regained consciousness on the way to the hospital, but didn't regain full consciousness until early afternoon. In the meantime, he was stabilized and his tongue stitched up where he had bitten it.

Mom, David, and I had a lot of time to talk in the hospital waiting room. It occurred to me that perhaps my action, in telling my mom to go and get a blanket, seemed cold or disrespectful. I do not, after all, recall ever ordering my mom to do anything. It's something that is simply not done in my family. My mom said, however, and I have said many times (especially in recent days and like I posted here originally) that you "do what needs doing." In essence, action is oftentimes better than inaction, and maybe especially in times of crisis. Even if that action is as seemingly mundane as getting up in the morning, eating breakfast, and going out the door to work. And by the way, mom has been absolutely solid. She is, for the most part, a worry wart. But when it comes to the really big things, she is an absolute rock. The one and only time that I flew into hysterics, for example, (the day that my son's diagnosis sunk in) she was...what is that old saying...as cool as a cucumber.

I am happy to say that my dad was able to leave the hospital Wednesday morning and come home. He was a bit wobbly; okay, he was a lot wobbly, and he used a wheelchair when leaving the hospital and without argument (huge concession on his part). But at least he's home. Yay!!!

Life is good...even when it's not!